‘How do I make other people happy if I am an autistic adult?’ … autism and happiness

There’s a lot of debate in the autistic community whether we should make other people happy or not, and whether they should first make us happy or not. However, some people are really desperate to make others happy, they mail to me and ask for advice. So I think it’s only fair that I answer that question, of course with the knowledge that every autistic is different and unique.